I Broke up with my Fears, Explored my Passion and Married my Dreams !

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Author: Neha Fatehchandani

Fresher Joined Corporate:

Just like any other fresh graduate, I was extremely excited to step into the corporate world. I began my career as a recruiter with a MNC. The initial year was quite eventful and I was enjoying everything about the corporate life. But second year onwards I started to dislike the monotony and had ceased to grow and to learn. But, from the second year, corporate life dreary with a sense of monotony setting in. I wasn’t enjoying it anymore, nor was I learning or growing. Thinking it to be a natural phenomenon, I kept on ignoring my feelings. Finally in the third year, I spoke to my HR head and requested her for changing my role, which she gladly obliged by handling to me HR operations.

Done with 2 years of working :

Compared to my previous role, this role was better. Each passing day was extremely jam-packed. Reaching home on time was an achievement. This way I successfully completed 2.5 years in my new role. Still in these 2.5 years, I was just working; there was no sense of satisfaction that I had experienced. Discussed the same with a few friends who suggested in unison that this was normal, a life of every working professional. “We are working to earn money not to have any satisfaction”; but somewhere deep within I wasn’t quite convinced- there seemed to be a missing element somewhere; but where and what was the missing element is something that I couldn’t fathom and thus continued.

What was coming next, I hadn’t expected

I thought I should share this with my HR head, who played a key role to bring me here. But she wasn’t coming to office for 6-8 months as she was suffering from lung cancer. Whenever we asked how she is, answer was she is doing better and will be soon resuming office. Time passed, and one fine day we got the news that she is no more: it was a huge shock for the entire team. Post her demise, things started changing; the work culture was becoming worse with growing internal politics and unsolicited pressures created thereby; going to office wasn’t spontaneous anymore, rather a mechanized process.

Emotional Breakdown

One day, while driving back home from office, I started crying. It was an emotional breakdown. I didn’t felt like talking to anyone. I wasn’t able to sleep. The reason for the emotional breakdown wasn’t just work but also an emotional crisis in my personal life, which made the situation worse I thought about quitting my job, but I didn’t want to because I was using it as a shield to hide my personal problems, as my go to place in times of stress.

Rejuvenating trip to Goa

After going through much, I went to Goa for a refreshing and relaxing trip with the family. It felt after a long time that I am relaxing, enjoying and most importantly getting the much needed time to introspect. I was at peace, and I realized there is nothing more important than your peace of mind.  After returning from the trip, I spoke to my manager and tendered my resignation, to be relieved from services after serving the stipulated 3 months notice period.

Explored like crazy

Post my tenure at the firm, I tried every possible option I could have explored. I explored other jobs, explore getting into share market, to being a broker, purchasing franchisee, worked on business plans, attended interviews in other companies for different HR roles, understood mutual fund investments etc- but none of these appealed to me.

I was just meeting new people and networking, when I chanced upon the book ‘Breakdown Breakthrough’ written by Kathy Caprino. The book was about a series of stories of women going through breakdowns due to a job they don’t like and then how they chose to give meaning to their life. This book gave me the much needed confidence that I have crossed the bridge and was ready for a new life. The author shared practical ways on how you can find out your passion. I started writing down my strengths, my weakness, what is something I can keep on doing on and on without looking at the watch

Explored the world of “Training”

One fine day, I happened to meet my teacher who had his own training firm; he shared what all he does; for the first time I felt an inkling of something that excited me, a much needed trigger. My MBA days I use to love this subject. I started going with him and saw what it is actually. Seeing is one thing practically experiencing is different. I worked on student training modules, learned like hell each day and that was really inspiring and satisfying.

When I gave my first session, Inner voice said “This is it”

I had experienced something that I hadn’t experienced before. My satisfaction towards my work was just growing each day. With the passage of time, I realized it is better to get into freelancing and handling different projects. The journey has been super amazing.

What all I have learned in last 1.5 years, is far more than I learned in 4.5 years of my corporate life.

Today I do not carry any brand tags with me, but yes I have trained people who are working in the best brands.

Today my earning isn’t great, but then it is far beyond what I was earning.

Each day I am excited to get up and work, there is no substitute for this feeling.

Today I am not a part of the Rat Race

My confidence level has soared to new heights.

Also with my boosted confidence, I was able to choose myself over my unhealthy relationship.

I would like to share a short poem which I wrote recently :

More I work, more I want to work;
More I learn, more I want to learn;
More I develop people, more I want to develop people;
More I add experiences to life, more I want to EXPERIENCE life;
Because life is meant to live, and not merely exist
We aren’t born to just act, but to create an IMPACT

Learning’s

1) Life is too short to be in something you are bad at or not good at, try out something that you are best at.

2) If you know you don’t want something, your 50%problem is solved after that you will get answer on what you want.

3) We just live once and that too how long is not in our hands, but yes how we chose to live each day is in hours.

4)   Do not just chose wisely, but also reject wisely.

5) If you take a risk there is 50% chance you will succeed, and 50% you will fail. If not, there are 100% chances you will fail.

6) After breakdown only 1 thing will happen, BREAKTHROUGH

7) Keep exploring options, whatever is your passion will take you in a way you would not want to see behind.

8)   Just do it, before you die

9) Rather than thinking whets happening around, let’s look inside ourselves, and know ourselves better.

10) Tough times can make you or break you, it’s in our hands to chose.

11) The biggest adventure you can take, is to live life of your dreams- Oprah Winfrey

12) Once you have clarity and put consistent efforts, you become unstoppable

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Neha is an Independent Training Professional. She started her career as a recruiter, handled core HR role and after knowing her true calling, got into training.

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